u ask what u can do and i don't know what to say. the needy part of me wants ur constant attention, it needs ur words, thoughts & ur prsence. but i know that is not the answer. the scared part of me wants u out of my life because it would be easier. the hateful part of me wants to hurt u because it thinks u've hurt me.
i will ignore u at times, i may be rude to u. i may hide from u and wait for u to reach out to me... so i know that u care. it's not fair to do these things, but i will... i cannot ask u to put up with this, it's not fair and no matter how hard i act, i care too much to put u through this. but u 've asked,... and this is all i have to tell ...
i write this for u. for u to read & ponder. though this is for u, but u r many people. u r the people close to me now. u r the people i want to be close to even though i've kept you away. u are the friends i've pushed away in the past, the friends that i've never had the chance to tell this to. u are also the people that i will care about until once again i push u out of my life. u are the part of me that is still trying to understand who i am. u are all of these people and many more...
but above all that, i need u still. so bear with me...please.
but above all that, i need u still. so bear with me...please.
